What is the Difference between Counseling & Coaching? Part I
What is the Difference Between Therapy & Coaching?
Well, as much as most writers emphasize how radically different they are, they often are not. There can be a lot of similarities.
Perhaps these metaphors will help us in this conversation.
Metaphor #1: Two Cars on a Country Road
Two people are driving down a country road in a storm. They come around a bend, and find there is a tree down in the middle of the road. The first car swerves and misses the tree, but gets stuck in the mud off the side of the road. The second car hits the tree and bangs up the bumper and quarter panel.
The first car just needs a tow to get pulled out of the mud, and then maybe some help cleaning things up and getting going better than ever. The second car has to go in the shop for a bit, and get some work done, after which it too will be fine, and ready to go. It will take a little longer, and require a different kind of work.
Metaphor #2: Up the Ladder
“In therapy, clients are trying to go from -2 to +5, and in Coaching, the clients want to get from +5 to +9.”
In short, historically, people seek Psychotherapy/Counseling when there are problems in their lives, and they want to get and feel better. In Coaching, clients’ lives are often already pretty good, maybe really good, and they want them to be even better.
Therapy/Counseling
Therapy tends to start with some variation of “What’s wrong?” To use your health insurance, you HAVE to have a DSM/ICD “diagnosis.” There are milder ones, and more severe-sounding ones, but the very mildest are NOT reimbursed by insurance companies.
My observation has been that this need to identify a diagnosable condition leads too many therapists to get caught in “What’s Wrong?” because what’s wrong is what gets them paid. In order to access your health benefits, I, too, have to assign a diagnosis, but I do not want to get caught in “What’s wrong?” forever, or even for very long. I want to focus on your strengths, your possibilities, your support systems, and so on.
Life Coaching
In my experience, Coaching tends to go faster, and be more intense, than therapy. There are not any significant issues of banged up fenders to work with—we just take off like hell. Surprisingly, I find that Life Coaching takes, not exactly more skill, but more…life experience. Holding space in therapy is not quite the same as actively co-creating a strategic plan for your life and jump starting it down the road. They are kind of different.
Much of Life Coaching involves not only being aware of life stages and changes, but having negotiated them. Thus, being a little longer of tooth can often be a good thing in a Coach.
The Reality…
The reality is that with virtually ALL of my “therapy clients”, we do elements of Life Coaching, since I am always looking to identify strengths and work with them, while working on developing narratives that emphasize your potential more than your perceived past failings or challenges.
Licensed in Hawai’i and New Mexico, and taking most major insurances in both places…
Life Coaching anywhere on Planet Earth, and even beyond, if you can get a signal there.
Please share this post if you think someone in your network of friends might find it useful…
Jamesmicknolan@gmail.com 505.699.7616