Who Comes to Me in Private Practice, and (maybe) Why…

Nobody much talks about this topic, so I thought some other private practitioners and grad students, and soon-to-be private practitioners might find it interesting. (Actually, it would be interesting to hear about 100 therapists write an article like this—we would learn so much….)

So, I did the Psychology Today and GoodTherapy.og thing, and splashed my name around a bit, via Social Media, and locally…

I did my best to represent who I am, and what kind of clients and issues might be a fit for me, to the best of my self-knowledge. (You can see what that looks like here):

https://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/name/James_Michael_Nolan_PhD,ACS_Santa+Fe_New+Mexico_268414

So, anyway…Interesting. Here’s my fledgling practice (I actually only have room for about 7-10 clients total, maybe 5 a week? Or that is my current thinking…I have a full time job as President of Southwestern College, which takes way more than 40 hours a week, then there’s sleep—I have to do THAT for 4-5 hours a night, like it or not…):

Three female clients, one couple. Six men, 2 of them gay, range from age 22 to 57, but I’m thinking the age 45 plus is probably more who I expect to see. My best bet would be that nobody has come into my office sporting fewer than 125-130 IQ points. Not sure I understand that one, and that is CERTAINLY not a requirement, but it is what has been happening…Is it a function of my profiles online? Probably, but not 100% sure…

What do I do differently?

• I do not work strict 50 or even 60 minute sessions. I just don’t. Sometimes they go as long as an hour and a half. Bad boundaries? You could call it that, but I would call it leaving room for organic processes, energies, and dynamics on any given day. Let’s just say, if your appointment is at 10, there will NEVER be somebody else scheduled at 11.Clients love that, and tell me so. They can feel that you are more rolling with their process than driven by your schedule book…Not everybody can afford to do this, I get that. Two clients take three hours, but it works for me…
• I am 62, and I have seen some stuff. Nothing surprises me, nothing is hard for me to hear. I can tell that several people dropped their testing bombs, looking to see if I could hold them, and it appeared I could. I do NOT see this as a macho thing. If I were truly blown way out of my league, I would refer you on…that WILL happen, has not yet happened…
• My life has not exactly been down the middle of Main Street, and I think my clients get that, and know that I can walk with them through their own back alleys and through their Subterranean Homesick Blues…
• I am always looking for the positive, for the optimistic (and realistic) perspective on their situation…I track joy, meaning, abundance, beauty…If you keep wanting to take me through the trauma museum, session after session, I am probably not going to be your guy…Nothing wrong with doing that, if you have to, or if somebody told you that is the way out, but I am not going to be much of a bus driver in those territories…because…
• I do not resonate with a culture of Victimhood—I believe in empowerment, self-empowerment. Some people are of the opinion that this is an overly optimistic point of view, or that I am being unrealistic, or that my point of view derives from the privilege I experience in my life (I do, no doubt). They are free to hold that point of view, and I will continue to hold mine. I want to help free clients move away from the tyranny of victimhood. If Viktor Frankl could pull it off………………….
• In my personal life, I put a lot of time and emphasis on the Principle of Attraction, on Positive Psychology. Over the years, I have enjoyed Ram Das, Tony Robbins, the Abraham-Hicks materials, Eckhart Tolle, Humanistic Psychology. I choose to work in the realms, and with “clinical” presentations, that lend themselves to these kinds of perspectives, and I tend not to work with those that do not, or with clients who are not in synch or resonance with those point of view.
• I hold a spiritually-informed perspective, without leaning on any denomination or lineage, or without claiming I know how the universe works, or which mountains are holy and which aren’t, and so on. In this respect, I believe I bring the Greater Picture into our work without the presumption (so prevalent in Santa Fe) that any of us really KNOWS how the Big Picture works. For me, honoring and asking awe-informed questions about the Big Picture is the end in itself, not striving to master it, or wrestling it to the ground with my awesome intellect, or understanding the true nature of it, or “seeking” anything, really. Just being in in, in awe, and loving it, is the highest place I have found, for myself…I do not aspire to anything beyond that, because I believe my ego would be the primary captain of that row boat…
• I am not a Ceremonialist, unless sitting in a room with another awe-inspiring human being and being authentic, and present, and in good humor, and in awe of what the universe delivers, is a Ceremony. Then I am a Ceremonialist. Let’s just say that, in general, I do not burn anything in my office, except a candle…

   Here are a couple of pieces I wrote on the Principle of Attraction:

http://drjamesmichaelnolan.com/the-principle-of-attraction/re-thinking-the-law-of-attraction-a-mini-manifest-o/

http://drjamesmichaelnolan.com/musings-on-therapy/law-of-attraction-and-traditional-approaches-to-therapy/

Anyway, as I mentioned, I thought that sharing my relatively new journey into private practice might be useful to my fellow therapists, to therapists-in-training, to prospective clients, to prospective supervisees, and maybe somebody I am not even thinking of…Maybe even prospective clients…

Thanks for reading…

Jim Nolan, Licensed Psychologist

Drjamesmichaelnolan.com

Drjamesmichaelnolan@gmail.co

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