Why People Hate Positive Thinking

Why People Hate Positive Thinking

Actually I have no idea. But is has become de rigeur to trash Positive Thinking and Optimistic outlooks these days. It would be kind of hilarious if it weren’t so effin’ stupid. I have no idea why some negative-ass son-of-a-gun has time to worry about whether I’m happy, or in appreciation, or feeling good about my future. But it sure seems to piss some people off…They even rage about it on Facebook. WTF? Get a dog, man! Seriously…

I am a licensed Psychologist, have been for over thirty years. Some other dude on Facebook, armed with his Carl Jung primer he just got at the used book store, wants to lecture me about “the Dark Side”, or “the Shadow”, or “being in denial”, or “Spiritual Bypass.” Give me a freakin’ break. I’ve read all that stuff, pal. You are hardly the harbinger of New News. And please don’t try to interject it into my life territory, where you do not live. Take it somewhere else.

But Isn’t There Bad Shit In the World?

Of course there’s bad shit in the world. So what? You want us to spend all of our days focused on that? Sorry, I’ve tried that at various points in my life, thinking it made me deeper, or more Existential, or whatever, and I’m kind of done with it. I will make a decision what I want to do with life’s vicissitudes, try to see what is RIGHT with the situation, and move on.

There is so much to appreciate. There are lovely people, and there is natural beauty, and James Taylor songs, your heart keeps beating without your even thinking about it, the sun rises, the sun sets, your eyes work if you are reading this, and your ears work if somebody is reading it to you, and there are Wire-Haired Fox Terrier videos on Instagram.

That stuff is all real. If and when there is pain out there, I will decide how to address it and move on to more satisfying stuff as soon as I am able. If I want to make a contribution of money, prayers, good vibes, my vote, or actually go and volunteer to help, I will do so. I just won’t let those negative vibrations colonize my Psyche and take it over. I don’t want to lose my autonomy and the authorship of my life experience to the negative stuff in the world, especially if it is stuff over which I have little or no control. Which is almost everything outside of my life.

Where Do People Vacation?

People vacation in Paris, not at the garbage dump. They listen to Dave Brubeck, not cats screeching. They burn sweet incense and wear soft, comfortable clothes, if they are able.

All in order to have a positive, pleasurable experience. When in pain, they take anti-pain stuff, when hungry, they eat, when they feel bad they see a therapist.

Choosing to Envision Better Possible Outcomes

We can groan and complain, or we can envision a better world, a more functional Washington, a containment of the Corona Virus, a healthy future, a spring to follow the winter. You CAN focus in the opposite direction, and I have no idea why you would choose that, except that it might make you feel like you are on higher moral ground because you’re outraged, or you feel more “informed” , or because you do not like taking responsibility for changing the feeling states that make up your life and life experiences. Well, have at it, then. Throw dirt, cast aspersions, launch grenades. See how that works for you.

I want to feel better, not more righteous in my feeling worse. Eff that.

But some people like to dwell on the negative, give all their power to the President, or Mercury Retrograde, or their boss, or their ex, or their parents, or China, or the Cheating Astros, and set up camp in that Victim Place. Feel free to do that. And if it somehow rattles your bones that some of us are staying Optimistic or focusing on what’s right with the world, I would suggest you not really make it your business. It only seems to make you more miserable, which in my professional opinion, is probably not a good direction to steer the bus…

Just to be clear, I can get as negative as about anybody I know, so this piece is written for me as much as anybody else. Working on it, though…

Sun’s setting over Waikiki. Think I’ll head down and take a few pictures…